Growing Through Pain

Faith Expands in Life’s Discouraging Lessons

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Last week’s message: All That’s Hidden…

1 Peter 1:6-7 (HCAB)

You rejoice in this, though now for a short time you have had to struggle in various trials so that the genuineness of your faith—more valuable than gold, which perishes though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.

There are times when things don’t work out as we planned.

• When we walk down the aisle with great joy and anticipation to say, “I do,” we never imagine that our happy marriage might end in divorce.

• The friend you thought was your “besti for life” turns their back on you, or the friendship dwindles because of distance or changes in life circumstances.

• Our child, with a full-ride scholarship to a major university, drops out of school and becomes a drug addict.

• After starting a position at the company you’ve always dreamed of working for, it became a huge disappointment as you discovered it isn’t what you imagined.

• Your determination to get in shape and embrace a healthy lifestyle often fizzles out after a few weeks due to a lack of immediate gratification and loss of motivation.

• Starting a business with a great vision and potential can become a struggle, then a burden, ultimately leading to its closure.

Life is full of disappointments and hardships that often leave us feeling discouraged and defeated. Whether it’s a failed business, a failed relationship, or a shattered dream, when these things happen, we find ourselves questioning what happened and wondering where we went wrong. God uses these very moments to grow our faith and draw us closer to Him.

One of the most profound truths of our Christian walk is that God is present with us in our triumphs AND failures. It’s easy to feel His presence when life is going well, when we feel confident and successful. But when we face hardship, it’s easy to feel abandoned or distant from God. If we turn to Him during our struggles, we will learn to experience God in a deeper, more trusting way.

Disappointing times force us to confront our limitations. When we face situations beyond our control, we are left with a choice: we can either turn inward, work harder, and rely on our own efforts to pull us through, or we can turn toward God and trust His plan.

Through failure, we learn to depend on God instead of relying on our own understanding. The Bible reminds us in Proverbs 3:5-6 to “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths." When our efforts fail, God’s faithfulness reminds us that He is always in control, even when we feel like everything is slipping away and when His hand in the situation is not seen.

By trusting Him, we can find that peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). Instead of growing bitter or resentful, learn to rejoice in God's presence in the midst of our struggles. Pain has a way of stripping away our illusions of control, and in that vulnerable space, we become more receptive to God's grace and power.

As we learn to lean on God in our failures, we begin to see that He uses these moments to shape us into who He has called us to be. Romans 8:28 tells us, "And we know that all things work for good for those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." I have written several Substacks on this topic; here’s one. God is not absent in our pain; He is working through it with us. As we endure trials, He sustains us, even during the most challenging times.

While it may not make any sense at the moment, the pain we experience is never wasted in God’s eyes. Through our failures, we learn humility, patience, and perseverance. These experiences teach us to rely on God’s timing, trust in His goodness, and acknowledge that His ways are higher than our ways. Each failure becomes an opportunity to experience God’s presence more deeply and grow in our faith, even if it is painful.

It can be difficult to rejoice in the Lord during hardship, but God invites us to do just that in James 1:2-3 (HCSB):

“Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that testing your faith produces endurance.”

Count it all joy?

Maybe reframing our troubles and viewing them as a way God is teaching us to rejoice in Him, no matter what, will change our perspective. That doesn’t mean becoming oblivious to the pain or pretending the situation is not dire. It means trusting that He has a plan we do not know and cannot see. It is holding onto hope with our faith. There is a reason for this suffering. Draw closer to God will help you figure it out.

Sometimes, the disappointment and sadness can feel so oppressive that we feel like David who said in Psalm 42:3-5 (NCSB)

“My tears have been my food day and night, while all day long people say to me, “Where is your God?” I remember this as I pour out my heart: how I walked with many, leading the festive procession to the house of God, with joyful and thankful shouts. Why am I now so depressed? Why this turmoil within me? Put your hope in God, for I will still praise Him, my Savior and my God.”

If things have broken down to the point that others, particularly non-believers, have asked, Why has God abandoned you?, remember that at one point, even Job’s wife said (in so many words),

“What’s wrong with you? Why do you still believe in a God who has allowed all this to happen to you? Curse God and die to relieve yourself of this mental, emotional, and physical pain!”

Through life’s most discouraging lessons, learn to trust God more deeply because His redemption gives us hope.

All real hope is born out of despair. Remember, the darker the night, the brighter the stars, and the deeper the grief, the closer God is to you. In every dark situation, there is a spark of light, a spark of hope, because our hope is in the Lord’s perfect timing.

Even when we call out, “God where are You? I need Your help NOW”, always remember that sometimes we are tested, not to show our weakness but to discover our strength.

Rejoice in His presence even when things don't go as planned. These moments refine our faith and remind us that we don’t need to have everything figured out. God is with us through it all, and that is enough.

Today’s Prayer

Dear Father, sometimes, when we are most discouraged, we doubt and sometimes, even forget, that You are with us. We believe Your Word and believe You follow through on Your promises. The promise we cling to most during our time of discouragement, pain, and disappointment is that You are with us and nothing about this situation can defeat us.

As we close our eyes and meditate on Your presence, may the love of the Holy Spirit embrace us, bringing us peace and comfort. Our hope is in You. Our faith and trust is knowing You always take care of Your children. You will bring us through these challenges; brighter days are ahead. Father, as we lean into You, we embrace the knowledge that it is Your will for us to be tested so that the test will deepen our strength and commitment to You. We know that You Are Our God, and in that, we acquiesce to knowing They Will Be Done. In Jesus’ name, amen.